We yearn to cling to the familiar, the well-known, the safe. But moving forward often means letting go of the past. For me, this month is such a moment.
Fairwater, the house I grew up in on Sydney Harbor, was sold recently with the settlement being last month. It has been in my family since the early 1900s. It is a truly splendid home, with an amazing garden and an incredible view of Sydney Harbor, including the Sydney Harbor Bridge. It contains priceless artworks and furnishings. Over the years, there have been parties at Fairwater where notable people, including politicians, ambassadors and Hollywood stars, have been entertained.
But for me, Fairwater has so many memories of my parents and past generations. My father was born at Fairwater and died there. I remember on Christmas Eve we would gather around the piano in the Drawing Room, and sing Christmas carols. My father would always start to play the piano with two hands and then would inevitably go to one hand. He had learnt to play the piano many decades before and only played on Christmas Eve.
The hardest part is that Fairwater represents, in some sense, the culmination of the loss of Fairfax family memories, even identity. First there was the AUS $2.25B takeover of the family company, John Fairfax Ltd., that I launched in the late 1980s. Ostensibly the takeover was in part meant to preserve family control of the media business that had been under family control for a century and a half. The reality was that the takeover and its aftermath hastened the end of family control of John Fairfax Ltd. Then in the ensuing decades, Fairfax Media, like many newspaper companies around the world, faced some challenging times with the proliferation of digital media. This led to the recent merger of the Nine Network (similar to the NBC or CBS Networks in the US) with Fairfax Media. As part of the merger, the Fairfax name will cease to exist in the combined corporate entity, though the underlying newspapers such as the Sydney Morning Herald will continue.
It is the sale of Fairwater, the family home for several generations, that feels like the last straw. It’s the last body blow if you will. None of my siblings or I would want to live at Fairwater. To me, it represents a lifestyle of a bygone age, a bit like Downton Abbey. Still the sale of Fairwater has had an emotional impact on me.
What does all this have to do with Crucible Leadership and moving beyond failure? Sometimes in order to move forward, you have to let go. You have to let go of the past. For me, the past includes Fairfax Media, the Fairfax name associated with newspapers such as the Sydney Morning Herald, as well as Fairwater, the Fairfax family home for generations. It feels emotionally like all the memories and heritage are gone.
But that is not my life anymore. I have a wonderful family and a great life in Annapolis MD. I love the work I do as a reflective advisor and writer with Crucible Leadership. I feel called to the two non-profit boards I am on.
Yes, I am proud of my heritage, my family, and its legacy in Fairfax Media – but I have chosen to move forward and not wallow in the past or in my own mistakes and failures any longer.
To move forward beyond failure means you have to let go. Be proud of where you came from but let go of that which stops you from moving forward.
We are not defined by our past or our failures. We are defined by who we are now, where we are going, and the people we seek to serve in this world. This is where our focus should be. We must always try to keep our eyes on where we are headed and the higher purpose we seek to embrace.
Reflection
What memories do you need to let go of that might be holding you back?
What is your higher purpose that needs to be your focus, rather than your failures or painful memories of the past?
Who are you now that the world needs to see?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
A World Lacking Authenticity
When you grow up amidst wealth and power as I did in a large family media business in Australia, you don’t always see a lot of authenticity. Amongst the rich and powerful, there can be a temptation to be who others want you to be. Outgoing, confident, in charge. Someone who has all the answers. Someone who can appear caring, but has the ability to not linger too long in any one conversation.
It is this experience that drives my passion for authenticity.
Putting on Airs
One of my highest values, along with humility and integrity,is authenticity. One of my most important goals in life is to be who I truly am, who I was designed to be. I don’t want to pretend to be anyone else. Like anyone I have my strengths and weaknesses. I have character traits that I am grateful to have and some I wished I didn’t have. But regardless, I want to be who I am. I want to be authentic.
I am reminded of a motto of the private boys school, Cranbrook, that I attended in Sydney, “Esse quam videri,” which means ‘to be rather than to seem.’ Growing up I often saw examples of ‘to seem rather than to be.’ People putting on airs to impress others and to create the appearance of self assured success.
It touched a deep nerve within me. I did not want to be like that. But who was I? It look me years to figure this out, to figure out who my true self was. It is not that I ever tried to be someone else. But growing up amidst the spotlight, often being around famous and prominent people, I was somewhat shy and diffident. Besides who I was and who I wanted to be seemed to be irrelevant questions. My calling in life, my duty was all laid out and was clear. I had to prepare myself to one day take a leading position within the large family media company. So I studied hard and did well in school. I went to Oxford like my father and other relatives before me, worked in banking on Wall Street and graduated from Harvard Business School. All to prepare myself for my future role.
But after my failed takeover bid, when I ended up losing control of the family media company, and moved to America, I started asking some difficult questions. Who was I? Was it OK to be me? What should I do now?
Who am I designed to be?
It has been a journey to fully understand who I was and who I was designed to be. In my case, it took quite a while. First to understand how I was wired, how I was designed. I was not the hard charging take no prisoners executive that I felt at the time that the family company needed. I am more of a reflective adviser. I would often prefer to listen and understand than to pontificate. I would rather advise and consult than be the leading figure in the middle of the action.
And second, to value myself as I was designed. It was tempting to feel bad about my gifts and talents, that I did not measure up to what was needed in the family company – that my design was lacking. But over time, I have realized that being a reflective adviser — rather than a hard charging corporate executive — was unique and valuable. There is peace in knowing your own design and that peace can give clarity in how to best apply your design.
So now, I try to lead a truly authentic life in light of my design. I try to be who I am. I serve others and lead a life of significance, though my writing, my executive coaching and through the advise I give being on two non-profit boards. I try to be involved in organizations whose missions I truly care about. I seek out opportunities where my design as a reflective advisor is beneficial and valued.
I am now at peace with who I am and do not yearn to be someone else. But it has been a journey.
Reflection
Are you truly being authentic to how you were designed?
Can you accept that it is OK to be you and not someone else?
What calling that you are passionate about would be best served by who you truly are?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
What is authenticity?
In this age of Hollywood stars, celebrities and athletes, we often long to be someone else. We long to be taller, more beautiful, more handsome, smarter, more self assured, more athletic. Anything but who we are. Taken to its extreme this desire to be someone else can even descend into self loathing.
It takes great courage to be authentic, to cast off your mask and be who you truly are. It can feel scary. It can make you feel vulnerable. It is one thing for people to dislike or discount the fake you, the one with a mask, but it is far more threatening if people reject the real you, the authentic you.
Why is authenticity so important?
To be successful, to lead a life of significance, we have to know who we are. The Greeks had a phrase, Know Yourself. We have to know what we are good at —our strengths —and what we are not good at —our weaknesses. We all come out of the box a certain way, with our own unique design. We may be born extroverted or introverted, athletic or artistic. We may be drawn to the sciences (such as math, biology, physics), or we may love the humanities (such as history, literature, music). We are often tempted to shore up our weaknesses, areas we are not good at. But our time would be better spent honing and refining our strengths, what we are good at.
We can then ask what profession, what calling that can help us lead a life of significance, something that helps others, should we pursue. In essence we are asking what calling should we pursue that is based on how we are designed.
From my perspective, God made us for a reason. He gave us a certain design to serve a greater good. Why would we even think of rejecting the design that we have been given?
Living and leading in light of our design to follow a calling that serves a higher purpose, is far more fulfilling. That is what being truly authentic is all about. What others think about who we should be and what we should do is not as relevant. What matters is living and leading in light of who we are.
How do I understand my design?
The first step that usually leads to our identity in life is not, “I know who I am.” It’s usually, “I know who I am not.” Process of elimination. Defining ourselves by what we are not, is the first step that leads us to really know who we are. And it’s usually in the wake of a crucible moment that you start to ask those questions of “who am I,” “who am I not,” “what does success mean to me”.
There are a number of tools out there to help us figure out who we are: Myers Briggs, DISC, Strengths Finder. We can also ask friends, family and colleagues who know us well about what we are good at (our strengths) and what we are not good at (our weaknesses). We can look at the course of our lives and look at the times in our life where we enjoyed what we were doing and were good at it. The SIMA Map, another good assessment, is a good tool that helps us do that.
Even without all these tools which can be helpful, we often have a sense of who we are, what we are good at, and what we are not good at. What we enjoy. What we don’t enjoy. We often ignore what we know to be true about who we are to make others happy. We often follow a career path that others say makes sense for us.
We have a far greater chance of being successful, of living a life that serves others, if we live a life that is in line with who we are and how we are designed. Living in light of who we are not leads to a life of frustration and does not make a whole lot of sense. Being who we were destined to be, being truly authentic — that is a successful life. That is living a life of significance.
Reflection
Are you living in light of who you are and how you were designed, or are you living a life to please others?
What would it look like to live a life that serves a calling that is beyond yourself?
What next step are you going to take to live an authentic life that is grounded in who you truly are and were designed to be?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
A Vision Becomes a 150 Year Reality
John Fairfax is a great example of a man whose vision became reality. John Fairfax was my great great grandfather, who started the family media company. The newspaper John Fairfax bought in 1841, the Sydney Morning Herald, was to grow into a media company that had newspapers, television stations, radio stations, magazines and newsprint mills. The company he founded was to stay in family control for close to 150 years and become one of the dominant influential media companies in Australia.
What were the keys to John Fairfax’s vision booming reality? John Fairfax’s vision had its start back in England in 1836 when a local lawyer sued the newspaper, the Leamington Chronicle that John Fairfax had started, for an article the paper had written about the lawyer. Twice the lawyer sued. Each time the court ruled in favor of the paper. But the court costs bankrupted John Fairfax. Out of this crucible experience, John Fairfax decided to leave England and take his family to Australia, a voyage at the time that could last from four to nine months.
John Fairfax’s vision was clear. His paper, which would be the Sydney Morning Herald, “would be without fear to express opinion, it would be without the reproach of self-interest, sworn to no master and free from the narrow channels of sectarianism.” It would not be a partisan newspaper, in an age when many newspapers were partisan. The Sydney Morning Herald’s motto, even before John Fairfax bought it, fit John Fairfax’s philosophy, “In moderation placing all my glory, while Tories call me Whig – and Whigs a Tory.” In modern parlance, this means while Conservatives call me Liberal and Liberals call me Conservative.
“You Will Win and I Will Win”
While John Fairfax’s vision for his newspaper was clear, and seemed to be influenced by his crucible experience, John critically had a strong support team. John’s wife Sarah was a woman of great faith. On their way to Australia, the ship that they were on passed the west coast of Australia, which to John looked like a barren forbidding land. John’s heart sank. He had brought his young family all the way to Australia to this. Somehow Sarah from below deck sensed the despondency in John’s heart and came up on deck. Sarah told him not to worry about her and the children. Sarah told him, “I do not worry about you; I know what you can do, and it is much. I know your strength of purpose, your sound, vigorous brain and your sense of honour. You are well armed, John, for any fray, and you will win and I will win, not only success, but content and great happiness.” What amazing encouragement!
John also had a partner that co-labored with him in the newspaper, Charles Kemp. While John Fairfax handled the business side, Charles Kemp would handle the reporting side, and they would together decide on the newspaper’s editorials. In the years to come, Charles Kemp retired and sold his share to John Fairfax. John had his sons working with him at the newspaper. John Fairfax also had the support of his church, where he was a deacon, the equivalent of an elder in other churches. The elders of his church actually helped raise some money to help buy the Sydney Morning Herald.
Refine, Define, Vision, Reality
John Fairfax faced a number of challenges in making his vision become reality. In a sense John’s vision was borne out of the crucible of losing his paper in England. John knew he was a good newspaperman. He was passionate about the kind of hard charging but impartial newspaper he would create. He had a great support team in his wife and family, as well as with the fellow elders at his church, and he had great co-laborers in Charles Kemp and later in his sons. A combination of great passion for the vision he had for his newspaper, being wired for the role he would play, great family support and capable colleagues, and his strong faith, helped John persevere and make his vision become reality.
Reflection
How does John Fairfax illustrate someone with a clear vision?
Do you have a support team like John Fairfax?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
Vision is Good, Reality is better.
There are few things sadder than a vision unfulfilled, a vision lost, especially a vision that you believe in, that you are passionate about.
Making your vision become reality is how you can lead a life of significance; a life that fulfills a higher purpose, a life that is beyond your own interests. This is a life that you are passionate about and are excited to make happen. You truly believe it was your calling. You were made to do this.
So how do you make this compelling vision you have become reality? It often starts with taking stock of your crucible experience. This may be the loss of a business, being fired, a health challenge or some other crisis that has a searing effect on you.
This crucible experience forces you to examine yourself. Who am I? What is my purpose? What was I designed to do?
You reflect on how you were designed, how you were wired, your passions and beliefs.
A Vision Emerges
Out of a clearer idea of how you were designed, and what your passions and beliefs are, as well as reflecting on your crucible experience, a vision emerges. This is a vision that you are white hot passionate about, that often comes out of the pain you endured in your crucible experience. Because you know how you are wired, you know what role you will play in making that vision happen.
In short, making your vision become reality is following the steps above; reflecting on the refining from your crucible experience, understanding how you were designed, pursuing a vision that is often borne out of that crucible experience and is based on who you are.
If you have a vision that you are passionate about, often springing from the pain of your crucible experience, and it is something that you were designed to do, that vision will have a far greater chance of becoming reality.
Can it really be that simple? Yes, in the sense that following these steps will significantly increase the chances of your vision becoming reality. No in the sense that making a vision become reality is not easy. There will be obstacles, some may seem insurmountable. There may be people who feel you are crazy, who don’t believe in your vision.
How do you keep going on this often difficult journey to seeing your vision become reality? It starts from within. Remember this is a vision that is often borne out of the pain of your crucible experience, that you feel white hot passionate about. This is a vision that you feel you were designed for, that you feel is your calling in life.
A Shared Vision
But there is another crucial factor. You have to have a core support team surrounding you that believes in you and your vision. In times of challenge, despondency or even despair, these are the people who will encourage you.
But you often need a team that will encourage you in practical ways; a team that will give advice specific to your vision. They may be knowledgable experts in relevant fields related to your vision. They may indeed be co-laborers with you in making the vision become reality.
One key point to remember. No man or woman is an island. We need people who will support us and encourage us. We need people to come beside us to help us make the vision come to life.
Reflection
What is a vision that you are white hot passionate about, that you feel truly called to?
Who is your support team that will encourage you and believe in you when times get tough?
Who is co-laboring with you to help you bring your vision to life?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
Moving Forward
A vision is often borne amidst a crucible experience. The seeds of hope can sometimes be found amidst pain and despair. How can this be? A crucible experience is like a shock to the system. The loss of a business, getting fired, a health challenge can all rock our world. A crucible experience causes us to take stock. We ask ourselves what is life all about? What is my purpose? Where am I going? What was I designed for?
To move forward, we need to find a vision that is uniquely ours. To make forward progress, we need to understand how we are wired. We need to know what are our innate gifts; what are our passions, beliefs and values.
Anchored by a deeper understanding of our crucible experience, which may include learning from mistakes we have made, and more fully appreciating who we are and how we are wired, we are in a good place to move forward.
Your Vision is Your Mission
We need to ask ourselves what truly matters to us in life. What are we passionate about? What cause or mission do we believe that we should give our all to? How does that cause or mission line up with our unique wiring and gifting? What role should we play in this mission? How does that role fit with who we are?
Notice how I am viewing a vision as a mission, part of something beyond ourselves. A vision that is in keeping with leading a life of significance has to have a sense of mission from our perspective. A vision that is anchored by our deeply held beliefs and passions will have staying power.
Bringing a vision to reality is not easy. There will be many obstacles. But if that vision is anchored by deeply held beliefs and passions, it is far more likely that we will have the motivation, the staying power, to keep going, to bring that vision to reality.
Vision Overcomes Conventional Wisdom
Walt Disney was one of the great visionaries. He was a serial visionary. He had many ideas that people at the time thought made no sense. Disney made a feature length cartoon in color called Snow White. At the time the conventional wisdom was that no one would come to see a feature length cartoon and take it seriously, at a time when cartoons were typically light hearted short animated features. Snow White premiered in Los Angeles in 1937 with some of the biggest stars in Hollywood present. When Snow White is presumed dead, the audience of Hollywood stars were wiping the tears from their eyes. At the end of the movie, they all stood and cheered.
Walt Disney went on to make many feature length movies, as well as launching Disneyland in California in 1955, and laid the groundwork for Walt Disney World in Florida, which opened in 1971 after Disney’s death.
One key moment earlier in Walt Disney’s career, happened on a train from New York to Los Angeles in 1928. Disney had gone to New York to ask the distributor of his cartoons to movie theaters for more money for his Oswald the Lucky Rabbit cartoons. But when Disney arrived in New York, he found the distributor had secretly hired away almost all of his animators and had inserted some fine print in the contracts saying that Oswald the Luck Rabbit belonged to the distributor. One the train back to Los Angeles, rather than sinking into anger or despair, Walt Disney got out his yellow legal pad and began sketching a series of circles. His sketches became Micky Mouse.
Vision + Perseverance = Achieving the Impossible
Disney did not wallow in his misfortune or beat himself up for not realizing what the distributor was doing to him. He kept on going. Few have heard of Oswald the Lucky Rabbit. The whole world has heard of Mickey Mouse.
Walt Disney illustrates the key attribute of dealing with a crucible experience. He kept going, and did not let this misfortune hold him back. I am sure there were lessons to be learned, such as reading contracts more closely, and being careful which business partners you trust. These are important lessons.
But Disney knew what he loved and was good at, making cartoons and constantly innovating. His vision would grow from cartoons, to feature length movies, to theme parks. Disney never gave up. Disney had this phrase that shows a great mindset for making a vision happen, “It’s kind of fun to do the impossible.”
Reflection
What vision is a mission that you truly care about?
How does that vision fit your unique wiring, passions and beliefs?
Do you care enough about the mission of this vision, that you feel you will overcome obstacles come what may?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
Discovering Your Design
A crucible experience is often searing. The loss of a job or business, a health or family challenge can make us feel like our world has changed forever. We can feel like our lives are over. But a crucible experience can reveal seeds of hope. Out of our pain, can come a vision to help others. In our misfortune, there may be clues as to how we are designed. Sometimes the reason a job or business did not work out was because we were not doing what we were designed for. Perhaps we were a round peg in a square hole. We didn’t fit.
Even if the crucible experience was not your fault such as with a health challenge or losing a parent at a young age, it will still tend to impact us to our core. We ask what life is all about? Why am I here? What is my purpose? Perhaps even, what was I designed to do?
You Have Unique Wiring
Our purpose, our place in the world is inextricably linked to how we were designed. We all come out of the box a certain way with certain innate gifts. We maybe artistic or athletic. We may have a gifting for math and science or english and history. Our innate gifts can be nurtured and influenced over time, but there is some unique wiring we start out with.
Overlaid on our innate gifting, are our passions, values and beliefs. This may be influenced by our family, our childhood experiences, our culture or experiences we have along the way.
A crucible experience can force us to look at who we are. But we can’t figure out where we are going, until we know who we are. A life of significance must be based on who we are.
A life of significance that is tied to our innate gifting, overlaid with our passions, values and beliefs is like rocket fuel. Being more truly us with a vision that flows out of the core of who we are, can give us unstoppable motivation and momentum. But a vision, however noble, that is not tied to who we are, what we believe in and what we are passionate about will tend to go nowhere.
You Can’t Inherit a Vision
In a sense that is my story. I had a vision of restoring the family media company I grew up in Australia to the ideals of the founder. I wanted it to be well run. That was a compelling vision, one that I thought was a noble, even honorable vision. But was this my vision? It was more my father’s vision, and ultimately John Fairfax’s vision (my great great grandfather who started the family business). One thing I have learnt is that you can’t inherit a vision.
What was needed to accomplish the vision, was a take charge leader. That was not me. I am more of a reflective adviser. I like to be part of a team, such as being a member of the boards I am on. I like to write and to advocate for principles I believe in. But a take charge leader, making hundreds of decisions every day, hiring and firing. That is not me. I am more of a contemplative person than an action person.
All this to say, I was pursuing a vision, however noble, that was more my father’s and my great great grandfather’s vision than mine. To bring about the vision required skills and aptitude that were not me. I was not designed for the task that needed to be done.
What I do now lines up so much better. I am an advocate for principles of leadership that I strongly believe in, as well as a reflective adviser, writer and executive coach.
Reflection
What are the clues in your crucible experience revealing about how you are designed?
What are your passions, values and beliefs?
Who are you really?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
Experiences That Make Us Ask Big Questions
A life of significance often starts with a refining moment, a crucible experience. Before we think about serving a higher purpose, something that makes the world a better place, we often need to be shaken up. Life is often like that. If life were easy and smooth, many of us would pursue goals of being successful, having a good career, having enough money to support our families, having the freedom to take nice trips and have a nice lifestyle. There is nothing wrong with pursuing any of those goals. But is our purpose in life only that, a successful career with enough money to have a nice lifestyle?
That is where the value of a crucible experience comes in. The loss of a job, the loss of a business, a health or family challenge can rock our world. It can make us ask big questions. Where am I going? Why am I going there? What do I really want? How will my life matter? How will my life count? The crucible experience does not have to be prominent. It could be losing a parent at a young age, growing up in poverty, having a sibling with a health challenge or learning disability. The size or prominence of the crucible experience, is not as important as the depth of the impact that crucible experience had on you.
Wallow In Our Trials or Move Forward?
When you have a crucible experience, it may in part be your fault and may be related to choices you have made. But sometimes, that crucible experience may not at all be your fault, such as losing a parent at a young age. But either way, you have a choice. You can feel angry, in a sense wallow in your trials. Your anger may be totally understandable, even justifiable. But does it serve you well? Does it move you forward? The short answer is typically no.
Our trials can inspire us as we move forward. If we lost a job or a business, to the degree we contributed to the situation, what can we learn about ourselves? Maybe the job or role we were in, was not a good fit. Even if it was not all our fault, what can we learn? Perhaps we were part of a team or company that lacked integrity, and wanted to cut corners. This can lead us to the next stage of discovering how we were designed, our talents and attributes, as well as the values we hold dear. We will discuss this in more detail later.
Turning Tragedy into Purpose
But sometimes the seeds of a vision that can help others and in some small way change the world are in that crucible experience. Joni Eareckson Tada is a great example of a woman who could have lost all hope after her crucible experience. But yet, she used her tragedy to help others and have a world wide ministry. Joni was an athletic girl who was injured in a diving accident aged 17 in 1967. The accident left Joni as a quadriplegic from the neck down. She has lived this way for over 50 years. For many of us, this would have seemed a death sentence. The road back was not easy, learning to adjust to her new life and learning to have hope again. But over time, Joni found inspiration in her disability. This accident actually strengthened her faith, making her rely even more on God. Joni has said, “There are more important things than walking.” What could that be? Joni founded an international ministry, Joni and Friends, which through its radio program has reached over a million listeners a week. Through Wheels for the World, Joni and Friends has shipped over 34,000 wheelchairs to developing nations. She has written over thirty-five books and is a highly sought after speaker. Amazingly through a horrific tragedy, Joni has found purpose in life that makes a difference in lives all over the world.
Reflection
What is your crucible experience?
What has your crucible experience taught you about yourself?
How could your crucible experience be used to help others?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
It Begins With a Crucible Moment
We have spoken about what a life of significance is. It is about a calling, beyond success, fame or career. It is about living in light of a higher purpose, something that is beyond your own interests.
But what are the building blocks of a life of significance? How do you get there? We will outline in more detail each of these components in future blogs. The following is a summary.
It often starts with a crucible moment, typically a failure or a setback that can alter the course of your life. This crucible moment can refine us. We can wallow in our misfortune or let that crucible moment point us to a life of significance. Do you have to have a searing painful experience to lead a life of significance? No. But honest vulnerable reflection rarely takes place without such an experience in our fast paced busy lives.
To live a life of significance, we have to understand how we were designed. We need to have a clear picture of our gifts and our passions.
Once we understand how we are designed and what our passions are, we can set our vision. This is a vision that is grounded in our unique design, refined by our crucible moments, and based on a calling that is in line with our deep seated beliefs and passions.
Once we know where we are headed, a vision based on a calling that we feel deeply passionate about, we are well on our way to make our vision a reality. There will be challenges along the way, but the passion and the calling that fuels our vision, along with others we have invited to join us on the journey, will help us stay the course.
My Crucible Moment That Led Me to a Life of Significance
For me, my crucible culminated with the loss of family control of John Fairfax Ltd, the large Australian media business that had been in my family for 150 years. For more on this, see My Journey.
This was a searing moment in my life, a refining moment. I had thought my whole life that my calling was to one day take a leading position in the family media business.
What this crucible taught me was that the type of person needed to lead the family media company was more of a take charge leader. That was not me. That was not how I was designed. I am more of a reflective adviser.
I had tried to follow my father’s vision and my great great grandfather’s vision (the vision of John Fairfax who founded the family media company). That was a mistake. My vision now is based on who I am and what I am passionate about.
As a reflective adviser, I enjoy writing and executive coaching, as well as being on the boards of two faith based organizations whose missions I care about.
In short, my crucible has led me to lead a life of significance that is in line with who I am and what I feel called to.
Reflection
What are the building blocks for your life of significance?
How have you been refined and designed to lead a life of significance that you feel called to?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
Being All That You Are and Living Up to It
The central goal of Crucible Leadership is to help you embrace your crucible moments to lead a life of significance. But what is a life of significance? How will we know when we get there, when we are fully living a life of significance?
A life of significance is about more than career, and more than success. It is not about being wealthy enough to live a life of ease.
Is it about leaving a legacy? In part. A life of significance is about being all that you are and living up to everything you believe in. It is about combining your innate wiring and design with your passions to achieve something beyond yourself. It is not about you. It is about contributing to a higher purpose. It is about feeling called to a purpose, to a cause, that is important, that is beyond you. People of faith might term this, a calling that lines up with who God created them to be. You hear such people say they feel that it is God’s calling on their life. There is a sense of the eternal, that you are part of a great movement.
A Whole Life is Devoted to a Vision
William Wilberforce certainly led a life of significance. He was a British politician who lived in the late 1700’s and early 1800’s. Wilberforce had an abiding faith that led him to advocate for the abolition of the slave trade and ultimately of slavery itself in the British Empire. The slave trade was abolished in 1807, while it took until days before Wilberforce’s death for slavery to be abolished in the British Empire in 1833. Wilberforce devoted his whole life to the cause of the abolition of slavery. He was an outgoing and charismatic politician, who was a good speaker. He could have achieved high office, either in the Cabinet or perhaps as Prime Minister. But Wilberforce felt leading a life of significance was about more than some political office. To Wilberforce, abolishing slavery was more important than high political office.
A Crucible Moment Leads to a Life of Significance
John Fairfax, my great great grandfather, led a life of significance as well. A key crucible moment came in 1836, when a local lawyer sued John Fairfax for an article written in John Fairfax’s paper in Leamington, England. Twice the lawyer sued, and twice the court ruled in John Fairfax’s favor. However, the court costs forced John Fairfax into bankruptcy. John Fairfax left England and took his family to Australia. There he bought a local paper, the Sydney Morning Herald, which became part of a large family media company. John Fairfax had a vision of a newspaper that would be vigorous and non-sectarian. As one biographer put it, “It would be without the reproach of self-interest, sworn to no master.” John Fairfax was a successful businessman and a beloved employer. He was an elder in his church. He was a much loved husband and father. John Fairfax led a life of significance in all areas of life, at work, in church and at home.
Impact Beyond Ourselves
William Wilberforce and John Fairfax undeniably led lives of significance. They undoubtedly felt they had a higher calling beyond success, fame or career.
They give us models of some of the core themes of a life of significance. It is about the cause or the calling, not about you. It is not about wealth or fame, it is about leading a life that is beyond your own interests. It involves somehow making a difference in the lives of others. Not many of us will live lives that are as prominent as William Wilberforce or John Fairfax. But well known or not, a life of significance can have a greater impact than we realize.
What is your calling?
What would it look like for you to lead a life of significance, to pursue a calling that is beyond yourself?
To explore Beyond the Crucible resources, including our free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment, visit beyondthecrucible.com.
Enjoy the show? Leave a review on your favorite podcast app and leave a comment at our YouTube channel and be sure subscribe and tell your friends and family about us.
Take the free Trials-to-Triumphs Self-Assessment to discover where you are on your journey of moving beyond your crucible and how to chart your personal course to a life of significance: https://beyondthecrucible.com/assessment/
